When life became complex, stressful and downright overwhelming during the past eight months thanks to a cross-country move and my 90-year-old Mom’s transition to assisted living, I was given copious opportunity to re-test many of my past failed coping mechanisms: worrying, working non-stop, overeating less than optimal foods, despairing and becoming resentful and angry. Surprise, surprise (NOT), they still didn’t work! None of them made me feel better or improved the situations. As is always the case, one of the great blessings along my bumpy trail was remembering and reclaiming the power of past life lessons.
Three weeks ago the light began to dawn when I remembered how I primed the pump of life transformation five years ago by embracing optimal nutrition and exercise. And so I recommitted to healthier eating, 30 minutes of cardio six days a week, with strength training three days a week. Immediately, the improved fuel mix began providing me more consistent and sustained energy. And the greater muscle strength reminded me that I AM NOT A VICTIM. Whatever my circumstances, sourced in the Divine, my power and discernment are excellent, limitless and reliable. (My appreciation for the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual power of regular exercise is so strong again, I even kicked off Christmas morning with 30 minutes of cardio.)
A week ago at 2:30am, as I held my husband’s head for an hour while he vomited to release some bug from his system, I was finally ready to let go of the remaining mental and emotional toxins in mine. In the aftermath, as I attempted to go back to sleep (having spent another 30 minutes or so working through a plan should I need to call an ambulance or take him to the hospital), I did some EFT/tapping and repeated a few relevant affirmations to clear and recommit myself to letting go of what hasn’t been serving my highest good.
I woke the next morning feeling lighter and more centered. While searching a digital copy of my own book recently to capture a particular passage for inclusion in a future blog post, I found relief for myself as well. Finally ready to let go of my resentment, I was ready to reclaim one of my own key lessons: when you feel stuck and can’t move forward, it’s probably because you aren’t making the baby steps to your goal small enough to be doable. Or when you accomplish your micro-moves, you aren’t stopping to be grateful and celebrate your progress enough to release the necessary constructive fuel that will help you keep advancing.
Beating yourself with a buggy whip to produce greater results doesn’t work in the long run. Life is a marathon, not a sprint. Berating yourself impedes your ability to go the distance with gratitude, grace and a joyful heart. Instead of using force to move forward, stick to the perpetual process for living in flow: baby step, gratitude, celebrate. Repeat.
Armed with those insights, it took just two hours to work through the document completion and uploading to re-finance our new home so we could benefit from historically low rates just two months after our initial closing. I made a plan to organize and complete all of the warranty registrations on our new home systems and appliances. My husband jump-started the implementation by sorting the carton of associated papers, forms and booklets into sets by item. Now we’re positioned to begin more easily registering them ONE AT A TIME.
Last night, as I enhanced my walk on the treadmill by simultaneously catching up with a friend by phone, I was reminded of other lessons. When you feel you are struggling, don’t try to go it alone. Reach out for an ear or a shoulder. Find a buddy. And always be your own best buddy. Be gentle with yourself. Take time for rest, reflection and play. In addition to feeling good, it actually enhances your productivity by increasing the efficiency and effectiveness of your efforts and the quality and quantity of your results.
You are a unique co-creative expression of the Divine worthy of unconditional love, respect, curiosity, compassion and gratitude in every moment. You’re the only YOU we have. We are counting on you to go the distance with us. I encourage you to behave accordingly and I promise to do the same.
Remember, life is a team sport. We’re all in this together—we are never alone!