When Life Sends You Lemons

Our study of the empowerment principles shared in Bruce D. Schneider’s book, Energy Leadership continues with an exploration of how we respond to life.

While most of us would be quick to say we want less stress in our lives, what we really want is greater ability to respond with equanimity, creativity and optimism to whatever comes our way. It’s been said many times, the only control we have in life is how we respond. We may not be able to choose what happens to us, but we can choose our responses to the people and situations we encounter.

Let’s take a look at five common responses people have to stressful situations. As you read through these five responses, you may want to think of a recent stressful event or uncomfortable news you received, and determine what your reaction to that event can teach you about how you habitually respond. You may have one type of response at work, and another at home or you may react differently depending on who else is involved.

When life sends you lemons, make lemonade!

A first—and all too common—response to stressful events is to suffer and make yourself a victim to it. People who respond this way don’t take action. Things happen TO them. Though they may invest considerable time and energy complaining and being miserable about their situation, they don’t take any actual steps to encourage themselves or try to change anything. Over the long haul, allowing circumstances to dictate your responses can take a dangerous toll on physical and mental health.

A second response is to ignore or avoid the situation. People responding this way make a decision not to get involved in a situation that they don’t see as concerning them or upon which they can’t have a positive impact. For example, someone may choose not to get involved in a dispute going on within their office if it doesn’t directly involve them.

A third type of response is to accept the situation and put it into perspective. Someone with this response may say “so what” and follow up with asking how much it will matter in a year, a week or even a day.

A fourth way to respond is to take action that begins moving the situation toward resolution. This self-empowering response is one that many effective leaders employ.

A fifth way people respond to stressors is to alter their experience of the situation. When we look at a situation differently, the experience itself changes. Changing perceptions can be the most challenging of the responses, because we can get stuck in our own limiting beliefs, interpretations and assumptions about what’s happening, but it is perhaps the most powerful of all.

It’s your world and you can create it as you wish. Remember, what one person sees as stressful, another person barely notices and another sees as exciting and full of opportunity. How are you going to choose to paint your reality today?

Curious about the energetic signature of your own habitual responses to circumstances? Start reclaiming your power of conscious constructive choice by signing up below for a 60-minute complimentary coaching session.

Web copy used by permission. No reproduction or retransmission is permitted without expressed written consent of Bruce D Schneider and the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC). ©2006-2016 Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC)

 

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“I knew Deborah before she became a Professional Life Coach. I’ve been amazed at how she has changed her life. When I decided it was time to begin making decisions about the next phase of my life, I knew immediately that Deborah was the person I wanted to work with. Her personal and professional experiences help her guide clients through coaching in a way that is individualized and delightfully eye-opening. Her warmth and sensitivity are immediately apparent, even over the phone. With gentle encouragement and permission, she will guide you through an examination of your life, including difficult experiences. She will help you gain insight from your past choices and then explore possibilities for moving forward in less encumbered ways. When you work with Deborah, your life will take on new meaning and your potential will be limitless!” Chris

“The work I did with Deborah continues to change my life. While I have learned many valuable lessons from her, the greatest was the deep insight that is available to me when I listen to and learn from my own inner wisdom. Her intuition, discernment and encouragement have taught me to trust my own intuition—creating new paths and possibilities for my life. One of Deborah’s great gifts is helping others respect and connect with their inner guidance and through that connection, to form a deeper, more meaningful bond with the collective wisdom and energy of all.” Ryan

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What readers say about
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“With the same energy and determination she applied in the professional world, Deborah has taken her considerable expertise in human potential and has now set her sights on the largest co-op in the world, humanity. ‘Choose Your Energy, Change Your Life!’ tackles what I believe are the most important questions we each must ask: who am I, where did I come from, why am I here, and what’s love got to do with it (cue Tina Turner)? These are not trivial or philosophical questions for the answers change what we do, why we do it, who and what we love. I am grateful for the opportunity to walk with Deborah on this critical journey.” JD Messenger, Award Winning Author of “11 Days in May: The Conversation That Will Change Your Life”

“To me the great thing about Deborah’s book is how ‘accessible’ she makes the ideas. The Oxygen Mask is probably the single best example. As with so many of the ideas in the book, she explains the principle in such a simple way that it’s got universal application to virtually any reader. I can imagine people having multiple moments of ‘Oh….I get it!’ throughout the book. The stories from her own life as well as stories of her clients’ experiences become stories about all of us—stories about which the reader will think, ‘I am living my own version of this.’ Well done—bravo!” Joe Calloway, Author of “Be The Best At What Matters Most”

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© Copyright 2016 DJW Life Coach LLC. All rights reserved.

About djwlifecoach

As a coach, author, speaker, singer, artist, consultant, radio host, Reiki Master and EFT/tapping practitioner, I share hope, possibilities and empowerment with the world. What's love got to do with minimizing stress and getting unstuck? Everything! My book, "Choose Your Energy: Change Your Life!" (Hay House/Balboa Press 2013) shares my story and the stories of 10 of my clients along with my signature Discovery Framework. During my 30 years as an organization transformation consultant, I served as a senior partner in four of the world's largest, most prestigious global professional services firms. In 2005, I took a five-year sabbatical to find healing and peace because non-stop work had taken its toll. My recovery from burnout, including a sustained 80-pound weight loss and freedom from 10 years of debilitating depression, led to finding my purpose guiding others on their journeys. Through healing and self-exploration, I discovered that loving yourself unconditionally is the key to transforming your personal life, your work and the world. With attention and intention, I learned to live in alignment with love through a wealth of energy-shifting tools and techniques that help me reduce stress, anxiety and overwhelm by releasing limiting beliefs, emotions and habits. My books, blog, radio show and signature coaching programs help individuals and organizations harness the transformative energy of love to turn unexplored possibilities into fulfilling realities and step into their greatness. To learn more about my work in the world, visit djwlifecoach.com. Subscribe to my blog at tiny.cc/djwblog. Listen to my radio show at tiny.cc/djwradio. View my author video and book trailer at tiny.cc/djwauthorvideo and tiny.cc/djwbooktrailer. Access 40+ tapping resources at tiny.cc/djwtaps. Send email to deborah@djwlifecoach.com. For fun, I love singing, reading, sewing, knitting and movies. I live in Williamsburg, Virginia with my husband, Wilson, and the three coaching cats who manage my life—SiddhaLee, Mortimer and Maisy Jane.
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One Response to When Life Sends You Lemons

  1. Sam Red says:

    Full of wisdom, as usual Deborah, which you explain in a very easy to understand way. As I read through these 5 responses I immediately recognised both my own habitual patterns and those of other persons in my life. I agree with you that the most powerful approach is the 5th one, and it is – clearly – one that we would all do well to get to grips with so that our past challenges don’t end up painting our present reality. Love & blessings, Sam 🙂

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