In the previous Energy Leadership™ blog post, we learned that self-mastery is about knowing who you are at your core and expressing that in all you say and do. When your thoughts and beliefs resonate at a constructive energetic frequency, you attract just what you need when you need it with little or no effort. So what holds us back from living the lives we desire?
Some people attribute the lack of having what they want to fate—that their lives are somehow “meant to be” the way they are. However, many people don’t like the concept of fate because it negates free will. But what if neither the traditional concept of fate nor free will really existed for most people? An unusual concept called self-fate helps explain why so many of us don’t have what we really want.
Self-fate is the idea that because our past is dominating our thought processes—and because most people are not consciously living in the moment—our past actually creates our future. Because we are making choices based on our past experiences, we cannot change our future unless the control of the past is removed so we can choose mindfully in the now. So self-fate really means that for most of us, fate does exist and we don’t have free will. We create our own fate because we choose to be imprisoned by the past. In this way, we limit ourselves to a narrow set of pre-determined choices dictated by our past.
Think about a woman who is unhappy with her relationships and says that she seems to meet the same kind of men over and over again. She complains that all men are the same: not interested in a meaningful, committed long term relationship, just easy sex with a constantly changing stream of much younger, very hot bodied women. She believes that she’s never going to find the kind of relationship she says she desires—one that is mutually respectful and supportive with both parties in it for the long haul. She believes she’s stuck with the types of relationships she’s always had—ones where she’s been emotionally abused.
It’s no wonder she feels this way—she’s had many experiences on which she is basing her beliefs. In fact, it’s quite normal that she believes what she does. Which poses a real challenge. Because she sees men as disrespectful, shallow, abusive and manipulating, she is broadcasting 24-7 at the “victim” energy frequency in alignment with her beliefs. And what’s the result? The energetic signal she transmits is picked up by those whose energy matches those beliefs: men who will take advantage of her. To them, she’s an easy target. And so, she actually creates her future relationships and will continue to do so until she changes her sense of self—WHO SHE IS BEING—in relationships.
Embracing the construct of self-fate reminds you that you are far more powerful than you realize. You matter! Self-fate is an internal force completely within your control. Good news: you are the only one who is response-able for your life.
In the next Energy Leadership post, we’ll begin exploring simple concrete steps you can take to get unstuck, harness your unlimited potential and step into your greatness.
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“I knew Deborah before she became a Professional Life Coach. I’ve been amazed at how she has changed her life. When I decided it was time to begin making decisions about the next phase of my life, I knew immediately that Deborah was the person I wanted to work with. Her personal and professional experiences help her guide clients through coaching in a way that is individualized and delightfully eye-opening. Her warmth and sensitivity are immediately apparent, even over the phone. With gentle encouragement and permission, she will guide you through an examination of your life, including difficult experiences. She will help you gain insight from your past choices and then explore possibilities for moving forward in less encumbered ways. When you work with Deborah, your life will take on new meaning and your potential will be limitless!” Chris
“The work I did with Deborah continues to change my life. While I have learned many valuable lessons from her, the greatest was the deep insight that is available to me when I listen to and learn from my own inner wisdom. Her intuition, discernment and encouragement have taught me to trust my own intuition—creating new paths and possibilities for my life. One of Deborah’s great gifts is helping others respect and connect with their inner guidance and through that connection, to form a deeper, more meaningful bond with the collective wisdom and energy of all.” Ryan
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“With the same energy and determination she applied in the professional world, Deborah has taken her considerable expertise in human potential and has now set her sights on the largest co-op in the world, humanity. ‘Choose Your Energy, Change Your Life!’ tackles what I believe are the most important questions we each must ask: who am I, where did I come from, why am I here, and what’s love got to do with it (cue Tina Turner)? These are not trivial or philosophical questions for the answers change what we do, why we do it, who and what we love. I am grateful for the opportunity to walk with Deborah on this critical journey.” JD Messenger, Award Winning Author of “11 Days in May: The Conversation That Will Change Your Life”
“To me the great thing about Deborah’s book is how ‘accessible’ she makes the ideas. The Oxygen Mask is probably the single best example. As with so many of the ideas in the book, she explains the principle in such a simple way that it’s got universal application to virtually any reader. I can imagine people having multiple moments of ‘Oh….I get it!’ throughout the book. The stories from her own life as well as stories of her clients’ experiences become stories about all of us—stories about which the reader will think, ‘I am living my own version of this.’ Well done—bravo!” Joe Calloway, Author of “Be The Best At What Matters Most”